A Pack's Journey Home. Private (2) with tenebria

[Abbster]

“How to you propose you do that?” Bella asked her mate

[tenebria]

Thunder sighed "I don't know, I have a feeling she just won't answer me truthfully if I speak to her" he said with a frown.

[Abbster]

Bella tilted her head. “What do you mean?” She asked

[tenebria]

Thunder glanced at her "Well Loners always have this idea that pack leaders are sort of like... well leaders over all in a sense. They Revere them almost to a fault, and she would never want to bother me with anything she was thinking, especially not anything negative" he said.

[Abbster]

Bella sighed, knowing he was right. "I don't know what you can do then" Bella muttered. "Thunder, you gotta think of something" She said.

[tenebria]

Thunder growled to himself "I know, I know" he said with a sigh. "Maybe I should try anyway, just go up to her and speak" he said after a moment.

[Abbster]

“That doesn’t sound bad.” Bella said. “I think you should go for it.” Bella said

[tenebria]

Thunder flicked an ear uncertainly, then nodded "OK, i'd better try now" he said, taking a breath and getting to his paws.

[Abbster]

Bella nodded. “Good luck!” She called to her mate as she trotted the rest of the way to her pups and releasing Drake.

[tenebria]

Thunder smiled back at her, then gathered his breath as he moved towards the loner. Askari noticed him and lifted her head, rising to her paws nervously, dipping her head very low. "Alpha" she said in almost a whisper. Such a loner. Through and through.

[Abbster]

Bella kept her eye on her mate as she pulled her still sleeping pups towards her belly. She licked their heads and then watched Thunder again.

[tenebria]

"Askari, is there something bothering you?" Thunder asked suddenly. Askari trembled slightly, her eyes flicking upwards before down again, tail curling between her legs. "N...No Alpha" She whispered. Thunder sighed, sitting down, leaning forward to stare into her eyes. "Askari, you are part of my pack, and I care for all of my pack. Please, tell me, I know something's wrong. I will not be hard no matter what the situation is" he promised. She looked up at him again. "I...I... I don't know how to speak... like that... to... anyone" Askari got out slowly, her voice jumpy, her muscles and nerves taut, as if she was going to run any second. "Just, go through your feelings since we've gotten here, or even from the trip" he said, laying down, going lower than her, showing that he saw her as equal in this moment.

[Abbster]

Bella tilted her ears as she tried to listen to the conversation between her mate and Askari, unfortunately for her, she was unable to hear anything as Thunder was talking so quietly

[tenebria]

Askari almost jumped in fear as he laid down, swiftly plastering herself to the ground, glancing at him with uncommon nervousness. "I.. I can't" she murmured, looking away. Thunder shook his head "You must" he said firmly. She trembled slightly, looking back again, then sighed, dipping her head as if in acceptance. "You're right" she said in a suddenly exhausted tone. And then it came out. "I.. ever since the journey, i haven't felt like a part of the pack" she blurted out. Thunder's eyes widened and his heart dropped, even though he'd known it had been coming. "It's not anything against anyone, but... they all have a purpose, a mate. I know i'm helpful to the pack, but what is my purpose here? Is it just to live out my days? I find myself thinking back now, many times, to the days I was a loner. I joined only for protection, but here... here I feel I could restart." she said, still not looking at him. He remained silent, letting her talk. "I know it's a lot to ask, and I don't blame you if you tell me to leave this land entirely, or force me to stay, but I feel that for both myself and the pack, I should leave, to live on my own. You need each pack member to be one you can rely on, and I'm just not ever going to be used to that responsibility" she said, her ears flattening. "I don't want to leave forever, I want to help you, to scout further than your scouts can, to bring prey if hunting goes bad... but when I can." she said, finally finishing, her eyes glued to the ground. Thunder sighed, then reached forward with a paw and placed it on her own paw. "Askari, I was happy to welcome you in, I saw you needed protection when you came to me, and I knew what a loner's heart would feel in close quarters with others, with assignments, duties, I knew it was not your way. Did I hope it could become your way? Yes. But I noticed since we arrived how much you wished to be alone. I hated it because I always wanted to make you feel as welcome as I could, but I saw you drift away. And I have already accepted it. You may tell the pack, or you may simply go when you wish and I will tell them. You may leave whenever you like, but once you have found a good place, a safe place for yourself to call home, please, if you feel that it is to your comfort that is, return and notify me. You will always be a part of this family, my sister, and everyone else's sister. No matter how far you go. Always remember that. We will be here whenever you should need us" he said. As he had begun speaking, she had turned her head to his, her eyes brightening more than he had ever seen, her tail untucking, her ears straightening. And when he finished, her tail thumped on the earth once, a wag as he had never seen come from her. "Thank you Alpha, Thank you" she said, eyes gleaming with joy. "I am blessed to have you all as my family, and I promise whenever you need me for anything, I will be at your call." she said. Thunder smiled and sat up, and she followed his example. With a quick motion he leaned forward and hugged her, despite knowing her aversion to such things. To his surprise, she first stiffened, then relaxed and reciprocated the motion. "We will miss you, but it will be good to know you will not be far" he said with a smile as he got to his paws and stepped back. She stood, a smile still on her face, standing straighter than he had seen in a long time.

[Abbster]

Bella nuzzled her pups sweetly as she looked back over at her mate talking with Askari. The poor female seemed sad…and almost scared. No dog should feel scared of her mate. When she saw the females eyes light up, Bella knew her mate had gotten through to her. At least she hoped. Was Askari going to stay? Was she going to leave? Bella felt as though she needed to say something, but that wasn’t her job. As Luna, she needed to help the mothers if they needed it, keep an eye on the pack when her mate went on patrols, and most importantly, take care of her pups.